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I Don't KnowI don't know what to do.
I don't how I feel.
My moods change so much- I can't describe it.
I can't explain anything.
I can't see a logical reason.
I can't keep trying to figure it out.
It's not bipolar.
It's not depression. Not all the time.
I have anger.
I have anxity.
I have self hate.
I have stress.
I have happiness.
I have hyperness.
I have depression.
I have suicidal thoughts.
I have hurt myself.

I can't explain it.

There are time when I think. Oh My God. I'm so depressed. I wanted was thinking of suicide. I was walking home so depressed. I sobbed my eyes out. Then was... Okay.
And then there are times when I think. How could I ha

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Submitted: February 14
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Monsters in her eyesby ~Sparkey38

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"how can you call her beautiful with those monsters in her eyes?"

~Moosezoomin Feb 26, 2013 Professional Writer

OMFG! I feel like this a lot, it's a big part of why I don't like to look people in the eye. I think they'll see what I really am inside. Its true, I think horrible thoughts all the time, and I don't want anyone I know in person to know this.

~Sparkey38 Feb 26, 2013 Hobbyist General Artist

i have someone who always yells at me. it makes her nervous that i dont look at her. she thinks its because shes ugly. shes absolutely beautiful. im just so afraid of what she'll see...

~Moosezoomin Feb 26, 2013 Professional Writer

And whats worse is that some people seem to be able to see.

~Sparkey38 Feb 26, 2013 Hobbyist General Artist

i think my love can. her eyes bore into mine. and you see her expressions change the longer the looks into me. as if she can see everything and shes confused about what to do

~Moosezoomin Mar 10, 2013 Professional Writer

I think my boyfriend is beginning to see into me. Tonight we talked about political things which turned out pretty good. I think next time we're going to talk about darkness. He's tried not to ask too many questions about my depression but he's extremely interested and been doing a lot of reading, which is wise, he should know what he's getting into. And like your love I think he's confused about what to do.

How long have you two been a couple anyway? I love hearing stories about people in love.

~Sparkey38 Mar 10, 2013 Hobbyist General Artist

were not really a couple, no. its not official. but she knows how i feel and is always reassuring me that she cares and loves me and will never leave. i only met her last summer. (summer of 2011) we got really close...

~Moosezoomin Mar 11, 2013 Professional Writer

Still, it's so awesome you are close. I had a brief closeness with a girl I met at camp one summer, except it ended rather badly

~Sparkey38 Mar 11, 2013 Hobbyist General Artist

i think what brings us so close is how she stays with me throughout my difficulties... ive been so insecure with her and she hasnt left yet. she just keeps reassuring me...

(1 Reply)

~MrHello556 Feb 14, 2013

I like this one a lot

~Sparkey38 Feb 14, 2013 Hobbyist General Artist

thank you

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Monsters in her eyesby ~Sparkey38

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